Friday, September 19, 2008

Mr. Max: A Day In The Life

6:00 AM. I think Momma is drinking her baby milk right now (they call it "coffee," but I know it's really baby milk), and I know she would think it were a really funny joke if I were to wake up right now while she's drinking her baby milk. I'll think about it....

6:01 AM. WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

6:02 AM. Momma comes in and says "good morning" and gives me a hug and a kiss and picks me up and exclaims, "Whoa! Super soaker, dude!" and then changes my baby panties.

6:05 AM. I get carried in style out to the living room. The doggies kiss me. I immediately start tearing the house apart.

6:30 AM. Momma is running around frantically trying to get all her stuff ready for work. She's crazy. I don't know why she doesn't get it ready the night before.

6:40 AM. I play with the buttons in Momma's car for a few minutes and then wave bye-bye to Momma.

6:41 AM. Ick. Now it's just me and dud. Guess he's got to feed me some breakfast. He tries, but it just ends up on the floor (no idea why) and the doggies eat it.

7 AM: Dad hoses me down and then he picks out some really lame-o outfit for me to wear so I can get beat up by Mr. Brendan.

7:45 AM. I shove Dad out the door upon arriving at Ms. Lindsey's. See ya later, alligator. I used to cry, but now I don't and literally shove him out.

From around 8-3, I am a calm, peaceful baby. I do what I am told to do and say "please" and "sorry." I do not do bad things like go up and down the stairs.

3:00 PM: Momma's here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SQUEALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! RUNNING AROUND HOUSE IN EXCITEMENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! For the next 20 minutes, Momma chats with Miss Lindsey and I run around getting into crap and I pant with excitement. I go up and down the stairs at least 23 times even though Momma says "no" and I make her chase me and then she starts to sweat and pant like me.

3:30: Snack time. Momma gives me a snack, usually milk and fruit.

4:00-4:45: Play time outside. We explore the cul-de-sac and hunt for squirrels. I keep going in people's driveways and Momma tells me "no." We chat with the neighbors and everyone tells me how cute I am. Duh.

4:45: Dad's home. Sometimes we eat dinner and then walk the dogs or sometimes we walk the dogs and eat dinner. Afterwards, they hose me down.

6:00: Crib time. I get into my pajamas and Momma reads me 3 books. They're lame, but I secretly like them.

6:30-6:45. Good night.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Max, it sounds like you have a very busy day! When do find time to open the door 786538750383617437329 times a day like your Momma claims you do? I love you alot!