Max's Wild and Crazy Spring Break

What he did....

--had ice cream from the ice cream man for the first time. He got a Sponge Bob Ice Cream.
--started saying "truck," but instead of sounding like "truck," he says, "fuck." And he says it like every time he sees a truck, which is about 452357023495o7234905702432 times a day. We keep correcting him, but he's not changing his MISpronunciation.
--cooked fish and a baby with Miss Sylvia at the YMCA. We joined the Y, and the nice child care attendant is a very sweet Cuban woman named Sylvia. Max was obviously hesitant to go to the kid section away from us and cried and screamed and just threw a major fit, but Miss Sylvia was very good with him and managed to calm him down every time. When Brandon and I went to go get Max after our workouts, we would find Max and Miss Sylvia playing in the kid kitchen and they were cooking a big plastic fish and Max had a toy doll in a sauce pan. Disturbing, huh? We will do swim lessons with Max at the Y starting mid-April. I am sure he'll have a blast.

Dear Aunt Kelly....

Many moons ago, I visited Grandma and Grandpa Ice's abode and came across a poor, homeless, malnourished, and rather unfashionable (read: naked!) baby doll. I quickly discovered that the doll was so malnourished that it ate its own fingers and toes. Rather than ignore the poor baby's neglect and terrible living conditions, I chose to pull a Brangelina and adopt the young child. She has been living under my loving care since then.

I have since named the poor lass "Baby," and I take her with me wherever I go. We have been on many an adventure together, and I cannot imagine my life without her. I share my titties with her, feed her, change her baby panties, provide her with soy milkie, and make sure she is exposed to great works of European literature.

It is my understanding that you are upset with Baby's residing with The Mr. Max. Do I need to remind you that The Mr. Max is just a baby? That you are an old hag? That the baby (Max) needs his Baby?

I will provide you 2 days to think about the error of your ways.

Sincerely,
Mr. Max

p.s.
You already made me cry once by telling me "no no." Do you really want to make me cry again by taking away my Baby?